Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Tories in Suffolk reacted badly late Saturday to the "terrible message" that the NHS says its electronic diaper can help reduce incontinence ∙ Brisbane has officially become the G20 host city just in time for the start of the charity event season ∙ a red Porsche will make an historic statement to the House of Commons about the importance of lifejackets ∙ plain tobacco packaging has confessed to "hostile acts" against North Korea ∙ the House of Lords has been accused of costing taxpayers nearly £20m hiring consultants to ensure Cristiano Ronaldo remains los Blancos' finest ∙ increased availability of Iranian oil could disrupt the dynamics of gay marriage & the cherry market ∙ Kim Kardashian defends her mothering abilities.
Monday, December 09, 2013
A Boris Johnson compendium
Boris Johnson is a dramatic mix of circus arts & street entertainment.
Boris Johnson was a poor student who is now regarded as one of the greatest inventors in history.
Boris Johnson came to fame as a child star on the Disney Channel's Hannah Montana.
Boris Johnson spent twenty years in South Africa working to fight discrimination, then returned to challenge the philosophy of nonviolence & interracial alliances.
A drumming Argentine woman wearing a Boris Johnson t-shirt says: "We've considered Boris a fifth band member for a long time now."
Boris Johnson is noted for his long-running role as Homer Simpson on the animated television series The Simpsons.
Fresh from his success at the Oscars, Boris Johnson has agreed to make legendary director Martin Scorsese's dreams of having the 3rd best band on Weller Street come true.
Boris Johnson believes that a big part of a mayor's job is to bully central government into paying for things that voters want. It's easy to overlook the time he was in the Tournament of Roses parade.
Boris Johnson has consistently been the number one side in world rugby.
Boris Johnson has so many mistresses, it's hard to keep track. A cheat sheet with a list & pictures of the women can be found online at email@example.com.
Boris Johnson deposed his mentor, seized his empire, & arrived in Israel in the regal style to which he has quickly become accustomed. The number of confirmed women acolytes is now at eighteen.
Boris Johnson believes that all human behaviour is motivated by unconscious forces.
As the oceans rise & simmer & the polar bears go under, Boris Johnson keeps quibbling with the inconvenient truth of global warming.
Sunday, December 08, 2013
Saturday, December 07, 2013
me the Swiss Cheese
calendar for 2014.
I've sent it back
because it was
full of holes.
Friday, December 06, 2013
a found magritte
Thursday, December 05, 2013
so_me nova_mber pwoe_rmds
from won des laits
Wednesday, December 04, 2013
Tuesday, December 03, 2013
Irish troops fired on by Silvio Berlusconi ∙ a communal latrine of fossilised faeces has been found to date back 240 million years ∙ less than half of all people suffering from Justin Bieber are being formally diagnosed because doctors fear stigmatizing their patients ∙ telescopes saw the still unfinished reactor disappear behind the star, but only tiny, leaping, amphibious fish re-emerge ∙ diehard fans of PlayStation finally got their hands on the next generation Syrian rebel units ∙ Boris Johnson says he "never, ever wanted to be a gameshow host" ∙ Rio Tinto's decision to mothball performance-enhancing graffiti production at its loss-making Italian newspaper site has polarized much of the community, with those in favor being labeled as liberal hippies & those against as rigid & old-fashioned.